Why Manifesting Doesn’t Work: Divorce Anxiety

Let’s dig into why manifestation may not be working for you.

Manifesting and Low Vibrations

We’re vibrational creatures. Everything in this world is vibrational, and manifestation functions are based on vibration.

Negative emotions vibrate low, and positive emotions vibrate high.

Everything going on in your world right now is a reflection of your vibration. It is all a manifestation— it’s just not an intentional manifestation.

When we women are in a lot of pain and we want to start manifesting, we have to work on some pain transmutation until a time when we are in a place where we can deal with everything.

Manifesting and Positive Focus

Suppression of your pain will help you manifest for a very brief moment in time.

Sometimes, we women have to say, “I’m putting negative things into a box. I will train my mind to only see the positive in a situation.”

And that temporary reduction in negative thinking will help you make progress in intentional manifestations.

But, this is not a sustainable long-term strategy. And eventually, it becomes exhausting because all of that stuff keeps trying to escape the box and it is still vibrating down there. It’s having a vibrational influence on your life after divorce.

Manifestation is a process, a journey, and it requires your awareness of what your vibrational emissions are.

How to Manifest After Divorce

Change Your Focus

You have to shift your focus to the silver linings if you want to change any manifesting that doesn’t work.

You then will tackle the stuff that you have emotionally suppressed, one thing at a time. I don’t advocate for long-term suppression – it leads to literal disease – but it is a great short-term strategy to use from time to time.

Use Suppression as a Tool: The When and How Without Dependability

You know that when you’re standing in your kid’s classroom in the morning, bursting into tears isn’t the best solution. So, you suppress it for a moment in time, and you circle back around to later in the day when you’re sitting on your shower floor.

Sometimes, we women know that we’re going to use suppression as a tool. But the key is knowing when and how and not solely relying on it.

Explore Healing Tools

Certain healing tools could be blocking your intentional manifestation. The healing tools I’m talking about are things like essential oils, crystals, self-help books, affirmations, and supplements. These tools are all things that I highly recommend as essential components to your healing journey at some point or another.

But, if you are relying on things like podcasts, self-help books, talk therapy, essential oils, and crystals for your healing journey, you are not going deep enough. These tools are supposed to support the deeper work, which can be destabilizing and uncomfortable.

Essential oils, crystals, and supplements are supposed to gently support the nervous system. Podcasts and self-help books are supposed to help unlock our awareness so that we can dig in and do the deep work.

Become Aware of Your Emotional Baggage

The biggest roadblock for you to escape divorce anxiety is unprocessed, disintegrated emotional baggage.

It is all of the relationship trauma, the early childhood trauma, the co-parenting trauma, and the trauma that comes from watching your children be in pain. 

Women have a longstanding history of being oppressed in many, many ways. It is all a big closet full of crap that you have not been tackling.

Transmute Into Your Subconscious Mind.

Within this roadblock, you are not fully transmuting into your subconscious mind.

The mind is like an iceberg. There’s the conscious mind, which is the ice above the water’s edge, and then there’s the subconscious mind under the water, which drives everything.

Your subconscious emotional baggage is driving all of your lived decisions, relationship patterns, and self-esteem.

If you’re not digging into it, then vibrationally, you have all this negativity going on in your subconscious mind, and you’ll be repeating patterns from that negative subconscious place.

Often, our biggest roadblock to making our manifesting work is not digging deep enough into the pain.

Identify Your Number One Negative Belief

Another blockage to manifestation?

You have a lot of negative beliefs that need to be shifted into positive ones.

• You have to transmute them.
• You have to get into that subconscious mind.
• You have to be able to feel those feelings.
• You have to be able to desensitize and reprocess those feelings and then introduce new positive beliefs, and then they’ll stick.

That’s the magic of EMDR.

There are negative beliefs you have in the subconscious mind that cause you to slow down your intentional manifestation and prevent your manifesting efforts from working. You ask yourself, “What if this doesn’t work? What if any intentional manifestation isn’t real?”

Those negative beliefs cause you to have self-doubt and make excuses for certain bad habits and bad behaviors, and you avoid your closet full of stuff.

Not fully accepting that manifestation works allows you to justify thinking negative thoughts. This slows down this intentional manifestation process.

Keep Manifesting Going

This is where a session of EMDR helps.

All of a sudden, there’s a way more spacious sensation in your body and mind about manifestation. You get aligned and you get fired up – but then you start to entertain negative thoughts again.

Abraham Hicks likens it to putting a pot of water on the stove to boil. You put that pot on the stove, you turn it on, and it starts to heat up. Then you start to introduce those negative beliefs in the form of self-doubt and it’s like turning the heat off.

And then another time, you’ll have an awesome therapy session, and then that negative belief rooted in your subconscious comes back online, and all of a sudden, you turn the heat off again.

It takes a long time to get to boiling when you keep turning the heat off and on with your intentional manifestation. So much of what you’ve been doing is based on living in your self-doubt.

The word manifestation simply means a physical representation of something. It’s turning a thought into a thing.

And remember, you will manifest whether or not you’re doing it intentionally.

So the big question is, what are you manifesting? Are you manifesting positive outcomes in your life after divorce or negative outcomes in your life? We women want proof that something will happen or a confirmation that a thought is possible before we believe in the process – that’s the opposite of how faith works.

Faith is belief in a thing that we cannot see. If you want to positively manifest, you have to know deep down that it’s coming.

If you do the footwork, if you’re aligned with it, it is coming. You can’t wait until it exists to believe that it exists, as that is blocking you.

You can’t just dream of something and then say, “Oh, but that will never be available to me,” because it will never manifest. Not because it can’t but because you’re thinking and feeling about it from a place of scarcity.

It’s all about leaning in and being willing to say the only way out is through. It’s probably going to be uncomfortable, and it might even be expensive or require you to stop making excuses, which is hard. But more often than not, the reason that you’re not making progress in manifesting is because self-doubt and negative beliefs are sabotaging you.

Takeaway

I hope you feel super inspired right now. I hope you’ve got your pot of water on the stove and you have turned that flame on. Don’t stand there and watch the pot and say, “This is taking forever.”

The Law of Attraction states that when you concentrate on a positive thought for 60-something seconds, you can change your vibrational state.

The key to making manifesting work for you is that one positive thought will call to another positive thought.

And after a minute or two, you will have tipped up on the vibrational stale. You have created a vibrational shift.

The longer you can boost one moment of inspiration, positivity, or joy, you are creating a state change that could create a positive cascade in your post-divorce life.