How to Deal with Negative Emotions in Your Post-Divorce Life

Let’s go back to basics: How to deal with negative emotions caused by a divorce trauma. What do you do when you’re crying alone on your bathroom floor, and how do you move forward? How do you get unstuck when you have low motivation and are feeling heavy pain, exhausted, blocked, stuck, overwhelmed, despairing, and insecure?

When you’re not thinking clearly, what do you do?
word combinations around manifest on purple pink background with feathers, How to Deal with Negative Emotions in Your Post-Divorce Life

Four Tools for Healing From Divorce Trauma

Our path out of this place is pretty similar regardless of what the trauma is. Today, we’ll make sense of what you’re feeling and what to do about it, as well as some very specific tips and tricks. By mastering the following four basic tools, you are leaning deeper into your intentional manifestation game.

Emotional Guidance Scale by Jerry and Esther Hicks

First things first. I want to introduce to you the Emotional Guidance Scale.

Emotional Guidance Scale (Abraham-Hicks)

What is the Purpose of the Emotional Guidance Scale?

The Emotional Guidance Scale is a tool taken from a book called Ask And It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks. This book has been a game changer for me and so many of my clients because this scale makes our feelings tangible. We women are so often lost in the maze that it is so helpful to have a very clear roadmap out.

The Emotional Guidance Scale goes from one, which is joy, all the way down to 22, which is fear, grief, depression, despair, and powerlessness.

How to Move Up the Emotional Guidance Scale?

When we women are at the bottom of The Emotional Guidance Scale, feeling fear, grief, depression, despair, and powerlessness, it’s a very low vibe.

What the Law of Attraction teaches us is that when we’re in a low-vibe state, our mission is to tip up on the scale.

We’re not here to quantum leap from one end of the scale to the other. We’re here to tip up and move slowly.

When you’re looking at The Emotional Guidance Scale,  I want you to notice which ones resonate with you.

Emotional Guidance Scale: Basic Tools

purple wild flowers

So, what are the basic tools to move up to these higher emotional states?

When we can’t see where we are and we can’t see where to go, we stay stuck longer. We are lost without a map.

Ultimately, we want to shorten your timeline of suffering because you have a powerful, beautiful, amazing life to get onto.

The longer you stay in those low-vibe states, the more you’re attracting negative things.

So, what tools help you to become unstuck?

How to Use Abraham Hicks Emotional Guidance Scale

The first tool is the Emotional Guidance Scale. I want you to print this out. I want you to take a picture of it on your phone and post it around your house. Have it handy. I keep this on my desk, and I use it in sessions every day with my clients.

This tool is not meant for you to fake it. It is not meant for you to bypass or suppress your negative emotions. We women have to be intentional about facing those feelings in purposeful places. And I know you’ve heard me say this before, but sometimes we go to therapy to unpack these feelings. Or we go to church, or yoga, or the gym. Find whatever works for you.

woman with long reddish hair, white blouse and jeans, sitting on a bench, head down leaning into her hands

Too often, we women go to therapy, and our therapists do an exceptional job at validating our pain, but we need a path out.

You are accountable for printing out this Emotional Guidance Scale, using it in your daily life, and becoming intentional about spaces to process this pain.

Slow down and take a deep breath: Where do you think you are on this scale? Powerless, unworthy, jealous, hatred, revenge, anger, discouragement, blame, worry, doubt, disappointment, overwhelmed, frustrated, impatient, pessimistic, bored, content, hopeful, optimistic, positively expecting and believing, enthusiastic, passionate, or joyful?

Breathing Techniques to Release Trauma

Your ability to acknowledge and pinpoint where you are involves our second basic tool: body awareness.

I want you to do a body scan now and notice your body at this moment. Breathe, soften through your jaw, relax your shoulders…what do you notice?

  • Do you feel tension or tightness anywhere?
  • Do you feel wound up?
  • Do you feel nervous in the body?

What do you feel now?

There is often resistance when I invite people to tune into the body. I know it can be overwhelming, but you will get to the place where you can tolerate doing that work and dealing with those emotions.

Now, fun fact: I am a longtime suppressor with a lot of chronic illnesses, and it was because I was so cut off from my body awareness.

Homeopathy for Emotional Trauma

Homeopathy has been essential because it has made my body a safe place to process and deal with negative emotions.

Even if you’re that person who can’t feel the body, there are solutions for you. You can read more about my homeopathic journey here.

woman in yoga outfit sitting on the floor, book and cookie in front of her, surrounded by plant pots, journaling for emotional trauma

Journaling for Emotional Trauma

The third basic tool is journaling. I want you to write down what you’re feeling during your body awareness, and I want you to wrap some words around that physical experience. Why?

Because writing it down enhances your capacity to process.

When you are obsessing over something, when you are rehearsing a conversation with a person in your mind over and over again, when you are feeling wound up a lot in your body, when you are struggling to sleep, when you are having digestive issues, when you are feeling depressed, it’s because a healing process has become stuck.

I am here to tell you to sign up for my 21-Day Healing Immersive Journaling experience.

Journaling helps stimulate that healing response to continue along its path, and you will find 21 journal prompts that guide you through The Emotional Guidance Scale.

It will take you from a low vibrational state to a higher vibrational state.

woman in gray pjamas, sitting in bed with coffee cup and books next to her, journaling

Body Transformation Through Walking: Step Count & Love

The fourth tool? Moving your body and getting your steps in. My favorite fitness coach right now is
@maverickonlinecoaching
. One of his top tools for helping women transform their bodies is getting up their step count. Walking is a gentle healing process. It is meditative.

When I walk, I don’t bring my phone, and often I don’t listen to anything.

Walking is where we process and deal with the negative emotions we feel. It’s where we hear our higher power speak to us. It’s where we tap into that well of spiritual power within us, where we get in touch with our higher selves, where we download the messages we need to hear, and where we leave shit behind us.

woman walking in pink walking shoes, How to Deal with Negative Emotions in Your Post-Divorce Life

Focus on These Four Divorce Trauma Healing Tools to Deal with Negative Emotions

Walk a lot and heal. You will get so far by just using The Emotional Guidance Scale, doing body scans, journaling, and walking. You will transform your life after divorce.

When you can’t sleep at night, when you’re overwhelmed, when you feel stuck, use these four tools. You have all the power you need inside of you. Take this information, take these tools, and run with it.

I love you so much. Peace.

Divorce recovery coach Dawn Wiggins

...helps people crack open. Challenging the status quo, she integrates multiple modalities from EMDR to EFT tapping, journaling, homeopathy, and movement, embracing remedies that heal both the mind and body. Divorce recovery coach Dawn Wiggins is on a mission to deliver life-changing therapy in an accessible, scalable, affordable way and make waves in the world of mental health with the same enlightenment that happens in her office. Part science, part essential oils, pure magic.

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